So ok.. I’ve been scolded for not updating again when there are actually good things to write about, so here goes.
I have a job! I’ll be working for an ISP in Cincinnati in the call center. Not bad pay and hey.. it’s a job! So.. yay. Which brings me to the best part, since the job is in Cincinnati I’ll have to move there right? Right! So I got myself a very cool roomate in a very cool house and I’m moving tomorrow. Yay again! I also have a cel phone now so if you’re interested and you know me, drop me a line and I’ll pass the number on to you.
So now for a bit of a rant.
I’m still dealing with the post-breakup issues that we all go through. I have good days and bad. I’ve really had to re-examine my life. I thought that having everything in common was a guaranteed ticket to happiness but I found out that it doesn’t work that way. My instincts have never been so wrong when it came to the other person’s feelings. I will be more careful in the future, and be thinking with my head and not my heart, as my heart is obviously not to be trusted. At this time I am more interested in finding good people to be friends than to find a new boyfriend. I don’t know sometimes.
These are things I will say to the next person I would be interested in dating.
I am tired of games and secrets. I believe that if there is nothing wrong going on there is no reason I should not know about it.This does not make me nosy, it makes me human. I am an OPEN person and if someone I care about wants to know something they know all they have to do is ask. Yes privacy is important but not when it compromises the trust of someone you love. There have to be priorities and I hope that someday I find someone who makes me the priority just as they would be mine. In the end I think that it is more important than having interests in common. (Though whoever I may end up with will have to like cats, because my cat stays with me no matter what) I have reasons for the way I’ve become, I’ve been lied to and cheated on. I had my husband look me in the eyes and swear there was nobody else, and then walked in on he and his girlfriend making out in a bar on our anniversary. That kind of thing scars a person and makes it harder to blindly trust people. It’s my baggage, but I think that a person who will be patient and open with me would find that I’m a really cool person to be around and their patience would be well worth it. No, I am not perfect, I have done things that I knew were wrong and I am not proud of that, but I try to learn from those experiences and grow with them. I try not to make the same mistakes over and over. I don’t care about my “significant other” having female friends as long as I am also part of that friendship. If I am excluded from those friendships I will become paranoid and “nosy”. If I feel things are being hidden from me I *will* try to find out what they are by whatever means I feel are necessary. If I am going to be a part of your life then I want to be a PART of it, and not kept on the fringe. If someone points a camera in our direction I want you to put your arm around me and smile. If I’m hurt and struggling with something I want you to be concerned and offer to help. If I ask you for reassurance I want to be reassured. If you have a problem I want to know about it. I want to be the person you turn to when you need to talk.
Asking too much? Maybe. I don’t care.